Leaf by Elizabeth

  There's a sameness to the days. Not a bad sameness, but one I'm not used to. Every day the same routine, as spring slowly drags forward. Meanwhile, my feelings rise and fall, as unpredictable as the days aren't. Yesterday was a really great day. Expressing my sadness and the things I missed felt really good, and I felt calm and cheerful all day. I went for a lovely drizzly walk in the rain, and got to knit while we all watched tv. Today, it's a bright sunny day, but I feel sad and droopy. Glennon Doyle has been talking about being very, very gentle with yourself and with others during this time. That is such a needed and welcome message for me, and I'm trying to focus on it. It's okay that this is hard. It's okay to respond however I'm responding. On a practical level, we've settled into what feels like a pretty good rhythm for our days. Definitely less structured than our initial schedule, but still with defined periods for activities: morni...

Flowers in the light. I've been noticing that I feel less comfortable writing when I'm feeling "negative" emotions like anger or sadness. I'm trying to push through that and honor all of my feelings, putting into practice that they are all valuable and worth expressing. Today I'm in a sad place- all is not well in the world, and I feel it deeply. (My logical mind wants to chip in to mention that things are never well in the world and there are always bad things going on. I get it, logical mind. Now can you go organize some index cards over there while I feel my feelings? Thanks). The virus is like a tsunami inching along, day by day. I hate the slowness of it- not being able to just get it all over with at once. I hate the "off-ness" of everything- all the normal parts of life stopped. I miss my petty little complaints about having too many errands to run or soccer carpooling taking forever. I miss hugging my Grandma and my friends. ...

Hi dear ones! Since this whole thing is becoming more of a marathon than a sprint, I'm adjusting my blog schedule to posting every few days or so. The first week or so I was feeling pretty good emotionally, but the past few days have been harder. I think it's partly that the adrenaline has worn off and we're all settling into this new normal. I'm finding that it takes some concentrated effort and attention each morning to calm and stabilize my emotional self. Thankfully I have the tools (yoga, journaling, art supplies, meditation, etc) and have been practicing this sort of thing for awhile. As part of this, over the last few days I've been drawing my focus in, instead of worrying about everything that's going on. It's kind of like walking on a tightrope and how you need to not look down, but just look straight ahead. I'm continuing to look out for ways that I can help others (like donating blood or contributing to local food pantries), but am tr...

Image courtesy of Lucy I've got some reflections for you today. Hang on for the ride! The Story The birds are carrying on as if nothing is wrong. Same with the crocuses and the tree buds. But I don't like the story we're living in these days. It's a sucky story which I would not choose for any of us. I usually feel pretty in control of my day to day life, but this virus has upended a lot of that. I find myself feeling like a character in a story that I'm not writing, like Harold Crick in Stranger Than Fiction . Making a Safe Space for Feelings Image courtesy of Lucy I don't like not being in control (who does??), and have had lots of emotional responses to this situation this past week. I'm trying to make space for them, especially for anger, which is not an emotion I usually feel comfortable expressing. I've often thought, what's the point of expressing it, since it won't change anything. But the point is that I'll fee...

Family picture, by Clara We made it through the first week of our improvised homeschooling! Lucy has done most of her school work up in her bedroom, and seems to be enjoying having that privacy and independence. Clara does some downstairs with Matt and some with me in bed, since I’ve been resting a lot (still have the head cold). Today I got to help Clara work on a poem, inspired by a poem about having adventures through reading. The scenes she chose are all from books or stories she read this past week. On Monday I wrote a book about my dad and I On Tuesday I climbed on the roof and saw a bird go by On Wednesday I flew on my broom stick, I felt the wind on my face On Thursday I sailed across the sea, I saw a new place On Friday I was almost eaten but then I became a puppy On Saturday my house got smashed by a falling hot tubby How do you think I did all that? Well just look I read all those adventures in just a few books! -Clara Nest I kn...

Lucy practicing perspective. The shortness of this post has been brought to you by….my head cold! Our schedule seems to be holding up pretty well so far. I know I talk about that a lot, but our family really appreciates the structure. We’re not rigid about it at all (academic time started at 9:20 today), but it’s still good to know what is loosely planned. The virtual learning has been going well, though Clara’s been getting a little bored with it, so Matt and I are brainstorming other projects we can give her. Today, instead of writing about a time when she felt proud, I asked if she wanted to write a story about Taco World (she’s really into tacos) in which the tacos have to stay home because salsa river has flooded. She brightened, and then said “Mama, that’s about the coronavirus!” She’s a smart cookie. We may also try my friend’s idea, having them each research something they’re interested in and then make a PowerPoint presentation about it for the family.  ...

Clara's drawings from the Mo Willems lunchtime doodle session. This will be a short post, as I’m in the throes of a bad cold (sore throat, achey, congested). At least this series gives me an opportunity to complain about how I’m feeling to a wider swath of people! ;) We loosely followed our schedule yesterday, though we allowed more video game/tv time in the afternoon, since the girls and I were all feeling sick. Really cool adventure video game- Zelda, Breath of the Wild Joys Seeing how great of a homeschool teacher Matt is- he’s taking the lead on guiding them through their assignments and gives them challenge math problems. Writing a new poem and this blog – I am feeling much more empowered now that I am finding ways to reach out to others and share love and encouragement. The homemade chicken matzah ball soup Matt made last night for dinner. Fuzzy sheep slipper-socks from my mom. Challenges Feeling sick, which ...

First day Our first day of homeschooling went pretty great. We followed our schedule, and though there was some complaining, I think overall it helped us all to have a plan to stick to. The girls did the virtual learning assigned by their teachers, we went on a long family walk in the woods, and Matt and I each got the work done that we needed to. We ended the day watching the first half of “School of Rock” together, which we all really loved (who doesn’t love Jack Black??). Bumps There were a few unexpected bumps, as we worked out how we will follow social distancing in the context of family and friend relationships. I didn’t realize how tricky this can be. We live in a townhouse development, and in the afternoon we let our younger daughter play outside with a neighbor’s daughter, with the view that we consider this other family part of our family group. Another neighbor questioned whether this was a good idea, which was well meant, but sent me into a bit of a...